Ice Cream 101 - Mom and Dad's homemade ice cream

Every summer, Dad would pack us up in the camper, or later the motor home, and drive us all over the West.  Whether we went to Lake Powell, Flaming Gorge, Burr Creek, or Hamm's Fork, we were running around the wilderness instead of running around the house.  It was fun, we had a lot of good times and good memories, it kept us out of trouble and it's probably the reason all of us kids get along as well as we do.

And there was always the one constant in every camping trip: The cranking of the ice cream machine.  Dad still has the old hand crank ice cream maker.  Mom would toss the ingredients into the steel tub.  Dad would place the tub in the machine, break a block of ice to pieces with an ice pick, pack in as much ice and salt around the tub and take the first turn cranking.  The rule was, "if you want some ice cream, you'd better take a turn".  And with 20 people in our camp site, you'd only have to do it for a minute.  About 20-30 minutes later, the creamy mixture would signal it was done by expanding enough to coat the lid of the tub.  Dad would disassemble the machine, slowly extract the beater and toss it to the kids, like a bone to a pack of wild dogs.  We'd all lick a little off as Dad portioned out the dessert.  We'd then sit around the campfire at dusk, eating fresh ice cream, sometimes ladelled over fresh cake/brownies from a dutch oven.  Definitely one of those memories that is burned into my mind.

The ice cream recipe they used is extremely simple.  ANYONE can make it and can be assembled in just a few minutes. It works great in the electric ice cream makers, even the newest type with the freezer inserts.  Just MAKE SURE if you cook the ingredients that they are completely refrigerated before putting them in the insert.  If not, you'll melt the liquid in the freezer insert and the ice cream will never set. You can eat it straight out of the machine, it's what we had to do camping, but it's a little soft.  If you place it in a freezer for a couple hours, it'll harden right up to the perfect consistency.

Fruit flavored Ice Cream (example of Strawberry/Blackberry Ice Cream seen above)
1 cup whole milk
1 cup whipping cream
1 cup sugar
1 cup chopped or crushed fruit
1 tablespoon Lemon Juice

If you have time, combine the milk cream and sugar into a saucepan.  Stir and then heat until almost to a boil.  Remove from heat, place into a bowl and refrigerate for 2 hours.  If you don't have time, that's OK.  Just move onto the next step

Pour the milk, cream and sugar into a ice cream maker's tub and let the ice cream churn for 30 minutes. Now add the fruit and let it churn for another 10 minutes or until the machine begins to labor through its rotations.  You'll know when it's done when it increases in volume and it thickens.  Move to a bowl and place in the freezer for 2 hours, or just eat it immediately if you don't want to wait.

Non-fruit Ice Cream (Shown as Cookies and Cream above)
1 cup whole milk
1 cup whipping cream
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
And then other ingredients like 1 cup chocolate, candy cookies or nuts

 If you have time, combine the milk, cream and sugar into a saucepan. Stir and then heat until almost to a boil. If you're making just vanilla ice cream, add an extra 1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla.  Remove from heat, place into a bowl and refrigerate for 2 hours. If you don't have time, that's OK. Just move onto the next step


Pour the milk, cream and sugar into a ice cream maker's tub and let the ice cream churn for 30 minutes. Now add the other ingredients.  For Cookies and Cream, add 1 cup of slightly crusted oreos.  You can anything else; nuts, chocolate or caramel sauce, brownie pieces, M&Ms, crumbled Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, chocolate chips, malt powder, even flavored extraxts like mint (no more than 1/2 teaspoon to start). Whatever you add needs to be at room temperature or cooler so you don't melt all of the work the machine has done for you.  Let it churn for another 10 minutes or until the machine begins to labor through its rotations. You'll know when it's done when it increases in volume and it thickens. Move to a bowl and place in the freezer for 2 hours, or just eat it immediately if you don't want to wait.

Garnish with whatever toppings sound good; hot fudge, marshmallow creme, crushed fruits or colored sprinkles.  Whatever it is, be inventive.
Now this recipe is the perfect size for a 1 - 1 1/2 quart countertop ice cream maker. But it can be cut in half, or doubled, or proportionally adjusted so you can have just enough to almost fill whatever ice cream maker you have.  Make sure you leave and inch or two at the top of the container so when the cream freezes, it has someplace to go.

Be as inventive as you want with these base recipes and make any flavor you wish.  Use multiple types of fruit.  Add some spices, like cinnamon to an apple ice cream.  Make chocolate ice cream and add crushed peanut butter cups or Butterfingers at the end.  Or just let your kids come up with some crazy combination and see how it turns out.  Either way, it tastes good and it's a great way to prepare a yummy dessert with your kids.

Grownup Raspberry Lemonade and the Hawaiian Island

I think we're not going to get any more snow this year, so it's safe to say we're entering the outdoor season.  Time to relax in the backyard with the smell of grlled meats and veggies whafting about, the kids playing on the swingset and sipping on a cool adult beverage.  Yes, I said an adult beverage. Nothing wrong about an adult beverage at the end of a long hot day.  And it doesn't have to be a wheat, barley, or hops based one.  I'm not knocking beer, but I'm more of a mixed drink fan.  So here are a couple that not only taste great, but will cool you off and take the edge off. 

The first one has a little alcohol and is great for sipping on a hot day.  It's a basic Raspberry Lemonade with a little hooch to get the party started.  The second is a version of a Long Island.  You know Long Islands have a splash of Coke added to a number of shots of alcohol.  A Loan Beach is the same, except replace the coke with cranberry juice.  I created a Hawaiian Island, which is the same Long Island alcohol, but with some pineapple juice as the mixer.  Great to nurse while reclining under a sun shade.  Disclaimer:  Know your alcohol tolerance.  That Means We Get Pie will not be held responsible for enhanced inebriation that leads to public nudity,WOOOOO!!! screaming, the revelation of embarrassing college experiences, physical or verbal fights with extended family members or friends, or any other social, political, religious, economic, or legal faux pas caused by a miscalculation of your tolerance level.

Adult Raspberry Lemonade
Makes roughly 64 ounces

1 1/2 cups raspberry licquer, your choice (I prefer Chamboix)
1 cup crushed raspberries
48 ounces lemonade (either from concentrate, bottle, or handmade)

Pour the alcohol and the raspberries into a 2 quart pitcher and stir for a minute or two.  Then add the lemonade and mix well.  Pour over ice in a tumbler glass and serve cold.  Goes will with almost any barbecued item

You can change the fruit as well and swap out the raspberry liqueur for any other flavored booze.  Try peach schnapps and peaches that have been chopped up in a food processor for 5 seconds.  Or even mashed strawberries with strawberry vodka.  Essentially you'll have about a shot and a half of booze per glass, which is enough for some people to get a little loopy.  I need to drink the whole pitcher, thanks to my high alcohol tolerance. 

And make sure to make a non-alcoholic version for the kids, but put it in some other type of container so you DON'T MIX THEM UP!!!!

Hawaiian Island
Repice makes one drink

2 shots Pinaeapple juice
2 twists of lemon
1 twist of lime
1 shot vodka
1 shot gin
1 shot rum
1 shot tequila
1/2+ shot triple sec

Combine all ingredients over ice and hold onto a large, solid, grounded object during and after drinking it.

So enjoy a little drinkie-drinkie with your meal and truly relax in the warm summer sun (finally).

Burger options for the unofficial start of the Summer grilling season

The best part about June is the weather.  Nothing like 80 degree days, 50 degree nights.  Yeah, you may need the air conditioner occasionally, but you can sleep with the windows open and let the cool air circulate throughout your house.  It's also perfect weather for a quick nine holes of golf after work or a walk to the park with the kids. 

And best of all, you can cook on the barbecue every night.  I've been firing up the grill at least 3 nights a week.  Not only for the number of great quick dinners that can be done on the grill (like Teriyaki Chicken, Fajitas etc.) but cooking outside doesn't heat up the house, so less air conditioning, and cheaper energy bills.

So let's talk about one of the easiest meals on the grill.  Hamburgers.  I could eat a burger off the grill almost every day.  And there is nothing wrong with a basic burger.  When I'm in a hurry, I'll throw a little garlic powder and pepper on a patty, slap it on the grill and top it off with a slice of cheddar at the last minute so it melts into all the cracks and crevaces.

But if I've got a few more minutes, I'll do something a little different.  Here are two recipes you can do any night and it'll only add about 5-10 minutes to your prep time.

The first one is for your cheese fans.  I love cheeseburgers, especially when the cheese has reached molten stage and oozes all over the bun.  But unless you time it just right, a good portion can just melt off and become a sacrifice to the barbecue gods.  So who says that all the cheese has to be on the outside.  You can place the cheese in the middle of the burger.  As it cooks, it melts just as it normally would.  It's just contained in a warm and toasty meat envelope.  And I recommend using different types of cheese, just because it gives you a variety of taste.

Triple Cheese Burgers

1 1/2 pounds ground beef
8 slices Cheddar cheese
4 slices of one type of cheese
4 slices of another type of cheese
Garlic powder and black pepper to taste

Leave the cheese out of the refrigerator for a little bit so it can warm up (makes it easier to melt later on). Divide the hamburger into 4 equal pieces.  Divide each piece in half, with one half a little bigger than the other half (I know that two unequal divisions aren't really halves... fine... go back to algebra, poindexter.)  Take the larger half and smash it flat.  Place the slice of cheddar on the patty and trim it back so there is at least 1/4 inch of patty showing on all sides.  Follow suit with the two other types of cheese.   Take the smaller portion, smash it flat and place on top of the cheese.  Squish all of the edges together to seal the patties together into one large filled burger.  Repeat the process with the other three burgers.  Sprinkle garlic powder and black pepper on the burgers to taste.  Cook on the grill until fully cooked.  If you really like cheese, take the leftover pieces from your trimming of the slices and lay them over the burger during the last minute of cooking.  They'll melt over the top and create another gooey layer. Remove from the fire, slap on a bun and add any condiments you like.

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Now many of you know that my palatte can crave some heat.  I love spicy food, so why not add a little tang to the burgers as well.  This recipe will add a definite kick to the patty.  It's a blend of spices and sauces that will definitely warm up the meal and help clear your sinuses.  Add in the charred jalepeno and it's it's a beautiful heat wave on the tongue.  Now on a heat scale from 1-10, to me, these are about a 4.... which means they're probably a 7 or more on yours.

Blazing Burgers

1 1/2 pound lean ground beef
1 1/2 teaspoon buffalo wing sauce
1 1/2 teaspoon mexican hot sauce
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon onion powder
1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
4 jalepeno peppers
4 slices of pepper jack cheese

Combine all ingredients but the jalepeno peppers and cheese in a bowl and mix well.  Divide and press the meat into 4 patties.  Slice each of the jalepenos in half and remove the seeds and veins (white material in the center of the pepper).  Crank up your grill to medium-high heat and spray the clean grates of your barbecue with non-stick cooking spray.  Place both the burgers and the peppers on the grill.  Cook meat until it reaches your desired level of doneness.  Place a slice of pepper jack on each burger and cook for one more minute so it gets all melty.  As for the peppers, turn the jalepenos often while the burgers are cooking to prevent scorching.  Remove the peppers when they soften and char, cut each jalepeno piece in half and lay across the top of the melted cheese.  Dress the burger up with any condiments you want.

I'll either throw a handful of chips on the plate, or maybe make some homemade french fries... but that's another post for another day.

So grill yourself up some special burgers and enjoy the warm weather!

Attack of the Fruit-cupine!!!!

The Family Birthday Party.  A Johnson staple.  About every month, we throw a little bash for everyone who had a birthday that month.  It can be for one person, it could be for 4-5, all depends on the time of year.  We've got to feed on average 16-20 people each time, so we farm out food assignemnts to everyone.  This time, my job was an fruit appetizer.  Wanted to do something more than just a fruit bowl and thought about doing something that the kids would think is awesome. We needed something large so I created this....

BEHOLD the FRUIT-CUPINE!!!

It's a porcupine made out of fruit.  Yes... it's big.  For reference, I have a big head.  I wear an 8 1/8 size baseball cap.  It's like an orange on a toothpick.  It's got it's own weather systems!  Things go wrong and I cry myself to sleep on my huuuuuuge pillah....

So in reference, you can see how large this piece can get.  This came from an idea from an appetizer Liz made.  She took half a pineapple and stuck large toothpicks covered in fruit all over it like a pin cushion.  I just made it a little larger and added the face, because kids think it's cute.

And the best part is that you can have your kids help build it.  Give them a few skewers and bowls of fruit and let them go to town.  The portions and suggestions of fruit are approximate, except you must have at least 2 pineapples to make the body and still have some to serve to guests.  And you can use any type of fruit you want.  The ones listed are just what I like and what I had available this season.

The Fruit-cupine

Serves 16-20 as an appetizer

2 large pineapples

2 lbs grapes

4+ pounds strawberries

1 lb blackberries
30-40 10-12 inch wood/bamboo skewers

Slice the top off of one pineapple at least 2 inches down at a slight angle to create the head. Set aside the remaining pineapple to cube later.   Slice down through the second pineapple just outside of the core.  Lay the body of the pineapple on a large serving tray, cut side down.  Then set the top of the first pineapple in front of the body to create the head and slide it into the cavity of the body.  Use either whole fruits or slices of fruit to make the features of the face, like sliced grapes for the eyes,  the tip of a strawberry for the nose, a half slice of pineapple for the mouth, etc..  When adding the faical features, hold the fruit in place, press the toothpick through the fruit and into the pineapple behind.  To hide the toothpick, use the flat edge of a knife to press the tip in so it is flush with the fruit's skin.

Prepare the fruit, such as washing everything, topping the strawberries, cubing the pineapple, etc. Take the skewers and add fruit in any order you wish, leaving about 2-3 inches at the end of each skewer.  Then stick the skewers into the pineapple body far enough so they will stay rigid and not bend.  Continue to add skewers until the body is completely covered.  Lay thre remaining fruit on the tray around the body for decoration and snacking.

So the next time you have to bring a creation to the party, bring life to your own Fruit-cupine and watch the people's reactions.

Contest Winners

Thanks to everyone who signed up on the site, Facebook and commented on the posts.  I've had record traffic and we have a load of new followers.  But you don't care about that.  You want to know who won the prizes.

First prize goes to Megan Best, who is a follower of the blog since close to the beginning.  She wins a Sub Zero hat, t-shirt, and $15 in gift certificates to the new store in Murray.

Second Prize goes to Julie, who commented on the website.  She wins a Sub Zero t-shirt and $10 in gift certificates. 

I'll be contactingthe winners shortly to arrange delivery.  Keep watching for more contests coming soon!  And of course, more recipes, starting on Monday.